Friday, February 23
Wow!
I was reading one of my favorite blogster sites and came across this. For a good laugh, enjoy!
KLK Anger Management
Edited from one of those chain e-mails that take turns to appear in your inbox and then your junk mail and then your inbox and then one fine day infecting you with a virus of the same namesake. This is the localized Yindian version, and is a good guide to whenever you need to "release stress". And we don't mean the massage parlour way.When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know. Rather, take it out on someone you don't know.
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.
A man answered, saying "Hello."
I politely said, "This is Ravi. Could I please speak with Latha?"
Suddenly, a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right fucking number!" and he hung up on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.When I tracked down Latha's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "you're an asshole!" and hung up.
I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.When caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic "asshole calling" would have to stop.So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Tan from Singtel. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?"He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!"
One day I was at the NTUC , getting ready to pull into a parking spot. You know how the waiting game goes. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me.I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his back window which included his phone number, so I wrote down the number.
A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole [I had his number on speed dial] I thought that I'd better call the BMW asshole, too.I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?""Yes, it is", he said."Can you tell me where I can see it?" I asked."Yes, I live at 34 Hillview Drive, just off the Dairy Farm exit. It's a yellow house, and the car's parked right out in front.""What's your name?" I asked."My name is Muthu," he said."When's a good time to catch you, Muthu?""I'm home every evening after five.""Listen, Muthu, can I tell you something?""Yes?""Muthu, you're an asshole!".
Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.Then I came up with an idea.I called asshole #1."Hello.""You're an asshole!" [But I didn't hang up.]"Are you still there?" he asked."Yeah," I said."Stop calling me," he screamed."Make me," I said."Who are you?" he asked."My name is Muthu.""Yeah? Where do you live?""Asshole, I live at 34 Hillview Drive, a yellow house, with my black Beamer parked in front."He said, "I'm coming over right now, Muthu. And you had better start saying your prayers."I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole," and hung up. Then I called asshole #2."Hello?" he said."Hello, asshole," I said.He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are...""You'll what?" I said."I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed.I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."
Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34 Hillview Drive, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover and after that I'm gonna kill myself.Then I called Channel News Asia about the drunk parang wielding jilted gay Yindian who caught his partner cottaging in a Little India public toilet on a Sunday heading down to Hillview Drive. I quickly got into my car and headed over to Hillview. I also called The New Paper knowing my Samsung phone was all but there for the taking.I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, a news crew and half the area's residents. And now I have a free phone.
NOW I feel much better.
Salute to this guy..
Cheers,
Tunitha
|12:39:00 pm|
Thursday, February 22
It's come to a stage where I realised that Singapore is so darn small. Haha! You seriously will bump into lottsa people, PAST & PRESENT...
Last Friday that happened to me... So absolutely weird... But hey, the first thing I felt was being proud of the position I am in. Let alms be considered alms. I just like to pity some people. Yeah like to act a saint sometimes..Haha! Sometimes in life, we would really appreciate the goodness we are engulfed in only when you realise that there's a worst off life somewhere else and the sad part is we see people living it. I realised it, and at the same time, pity those caught in it.
Expressions are easily seen on the faces to judge the condition of the person and some literally on their faces itself. Well, too bad, choices were made and it's upto the relevant parties to either make or break their concurrent lives.
Thats about all I can pen for now... Next will be about the trip we guys took. It was so freaking fantasticly natural.
Cheers,
Tunitha
|9:35:00 pm|
Wednesday, February 14
Happy Valentine's Day!!!
This is my best Valentine's Day ever...
Been so absolutely long since I've felt this happy and overjoyed with so much of love being showered over me...
I rather show it than express how I feel...
This was given to me by My Husband! An extremely pleasant surprise. It was delivered right to my office doorstep... Oh yeah, and I've also got what I did for him...
My favorite color of roses...BLUE!!! So darn beautiful!!!
The outside of the Card..
These were the words inside the card.... Dee I love you so very very much!!! Muacks!!!
This is what I gave my Hubby...An A1 Size Picture with a poem framed up... A poem I wrote just for him...and DEE, I mean each and every word I say there to you...Loving you always till eternity!
Cheers,
Tunitha
|9:07:00 am|
Thursday, February 8
The Promised Make-over Photos....
Tell me your favourite...
Till the next post...
Cheers,
Tunitha
|11:46:00 am|
~*@GoSSiP_CoLuMN@*~